1. My Diggs Small (60) 2-0: Consistent. Dangerous. Underrated. Just like Noaer in bed.
2. Slytherin Football Club (27) 2-0: Getting the wins. Points are for suckers.
3. Sons of Apathy (2) 1-1: Inconsistent, but with high upside. It's either thrilling or disappointing. Just like Jordan in bed.
4. Part Time Models (1) 1-1: You can't live every week like it's Shark Week, AG. Didn't keep the sizzle this week.
5. Legion of Roon 1-1: Relying on clutch, big-time performances to get something going. Just like Cam in a relationship.
6. Big Red Bastards 1-1: "How does your team go from....." what a riot this guy is. Very consistent though. Those kind of points get you a win every time, 62% of the time, Rice.
7. Vanquishing Legion 1-1: A little manic. Sometimes frantic. Reliable for a win half the time. Just like Travis....you know what, that's enough of that schtick.
8. Flying Squirrel 1-1: Though the output isn't real great, the low points and expectations will even have this squirrel finding a nut every once in a while. Just like Proctor on Tinder.
9. Dakless 0-2: Look, Ma! He's not at the bottom of the league. Though he is definitely a bottom.
10. Quagmire Crackerjacks 0-2: How's the Dalvin Cook trade going? You like that? Huh? You feel that one, Captain Compost?
